They just find it quite boring and exhausting,” said Laurie Helgoe, assistant professor at Davis & Elkins College and author of .

“Introverts tend to be most comfortable in one-on-one situations where they don’t have to compete for attention,” said Dembling.

On a date, introverts will give you their undivided attention, which makes them great listeners and leads to more in-depth conversations, especially when the person they’re with allows them to open up.

“They can be good conversationalists if they’re with someone who gives them the space to respond and shows interest in their interests,” she said.

It’s Friday night and your friend asks you to go with her to a house party where you’ll know no one. Who knows, maybe you’ll meet the love of your life. Approaching people seems impossible and small talk is exhausting, so you stand near the guacamole, pet the dog a few times, and quietly slip out before midnight—excited to return to your couch and Netflix. We spoke with introversion experts about how shier guys and gals can harness their best qualities to find love, and now present your complete guide to dating while introverted—also useful for extroverts looking to woo an introvert! “Wander up to those folks and try starting a conversation.” Even better, join a group that meets regularly such as a club, class, or sports team.

While extroverts derive energy from being around other people, recharge by being alone—and find the types of big group gatherings where couples often meet (read: parties and bars) draining. If you’re nodding your head right now, you’re in luck.

Since introverts often find crowded social events overwhelming, meeting potential dates can be difficult. “Introverts tend to be slow to warm up to people enough to connect,” she said.But where there are crowds, there are fellow introverts! So Dembling recommends that introverts look for others on the outskirts of gatherings. “Seeing people over and over and sharing a common interest provide easier entree into conversation than just going to a party or bar where you have to jump in with both feet right away.” As you probably well know, introverts don’t necessarily want to chat about the weather or what you did at work that day. “That doesn’t mean an introvert is unskilled in making small talk.“Introverts can be real chatterboxes when talking about things they’re passionate about,” said Dembling.“Sometimes they have to watch themselves—it’s kind of like running downhill.Once they get started, introverts pick up speed and have trouble stopping.Which can be either charming or confusing to the other person.” Actual dates are where introverts shine.